L is for Lawyer

Today I finally made it to my lawyer's appointment, after rescheduling it twice. (And I learned that once I pay a $1000 retainer with interac, I'm over my transaction limit, and even though there is money in my bank account, cannot pay with debit at the grocery store.)

I should have a draft separation agreement in my hands by the end of the week. The plan is: separation agreement, request income records from my ex to determine child support, and 'over the counter' divorce application. 

Just answering the questions is stressful and emotional: when were you married, when did you start living together, how old are the kids? What's the current financial arrangement, how often does he see the kids, what does he pay in support? 

My first impression of my lawyer is great - she was clear and supportive and patient. She offered suggestions when I asked for them, gave me clear choices. I'm glad I'm in a place where I can say "Honestly, I'd love sole custody, but realistically I can live with joint custody." In some ways, time has made this easier, because I know that de facto joint custody has looked an awful lot like sole custody for the past 6 1/2 years... that I can agree to pretty much whatever access he wants, because he won't follow through on it; more's the pity. 

I wouldn't be as sane and strong as I am without my friends, without you all - out there in the ether. You've been there, listening and supporting as I've mourned and raged and frothed at the mouth; and it was your support that helped me pick up the phone and make an appointment and keep it. 

Thank you. You are a blessing to me. And I am so grateful for you all.

K is for Kells

Kid and I watched The Secret of the Kells tonight.  Have you seen it? It's amazing, we were riveted. As in, neither the teenager or I touched our tablets/smartphones/laptops/knitting during the whole thing. Which is pretty much unheard of in our house. As the opening credits rolled, the boy asked me what it was about, and I'm pretty sure he thought I was crazy when I replied "A monk and a bible"; but wow. 

In parts the animation reminded me of Samurai Jack, and that's not a coincidence, apparently. It's gorgeous to watch, and the conficts and tension is incredibly well done. 

I loved it. And if you haven't seen it, you really should. When it was over, kidlet booted up his netbook, and the next thing I knew, he was googling the real Book of Kells. Pretty cool.