Some Canadian Humour, courtesy of my dad

[beachlass]

Here is what Jeff Foxworthy had to say about Canadians during a recent
appearance at Caesars in Windsor: 

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from 
September through May, 
You may live in Canada . 


If someone in a Home Depot store 
Offers you assistance and they don't work there, 
You may live in Canada . 


If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, 
You may live in Canada . 


If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation 
With someone who dialed a wrong number, 
You may live in Canada ... 


If 'Vacation' means going anywhere 
South of Detroit for the weekend, 
You may live in Canada . 


If you measure distance in hours, 
You may live in Canada . 


If you know several people 
Who have hit a deer more than once, 
You may live in Canada . 


If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C' 
In the same day and back again, 
You may live in Canada . 


If you can drive 90 km/hr through 2 feet of snow 
During a raging blizzard without flinching, 
You may live in Canada . 


If you install security lights on your house and garage, 
But leave both unlocked, 
You may live in Canada .


If you carry jumper cables in your car 
And your wife knows how to use them, 
You may live in Canada . 


If you design your kid's Halloween costume 
To fit over a snowsuit, 
You may live in Canada . 


If the speed limit on the highway is 80 km -- 
You're going 95 and everybody is passing you, 
You may live in Canada . 


If driving is better in the winter 
Because the potholes are filled with snow, 
You may live in Canada . 


If you know all 4 seasons: 
Almost winter, winter, still winter, 
and road construction, 
You may live in Canada . 

(this is my favourite, because how true) 


If you have more miles 
On your snow blower than your car, 
You may live in Canada . 


If you find -2 degrees 'a little chilly', 
You may live in Canada . 


If you actually understand these jokes, 
and forward them to all 
your friends, 

you definitely are Canadian and proud to be. 
 --    		 	   		  
------- End of forwarded message -------
  

Comments

[kate]

Ahahaha - so, these are totally things I've heard used for "You may live in Wisconsin." And yeah, it's gone around and I've forwarded it to family (not to mention done over half of them). But we also call Wisconsin "Southern Canada." :D

[beachlass]

Hee! I thought they would likely resonate in some of the northern states. They could be "You know you live in the Great Lakes regions...."

[kate]

Totally. But I love anything that makes me feel more Canadian. :D